I just realized last night that I get both Cartoon Network and Animal Planet on the television here in the dorm. You have to be smarter than the remote though and punch in the numbers 7 and 22. It doesn't automatically find them. I can't imagine why they would want to censor those two channels out. Perhaps a connection to campus violence? ha

I take the Praxis exam tomorrow. If I pass (which I will) I will be a certified teacher - I'm pretty sure. It's exciting because this is what I've worked four years for. Well, more than four years to be accurate.

I got one of those "create your own tumbler" cups from Starbucks as a bday gift and excitely created an amazing collage featuring my bf, cat, family and best friends....couldn't get the damn template back into the mug. that's my project for the weekend i guess. christmas tree is going up tomorrow. i know i was protesting about the deco around here, but it's actually what i need right now. brian and i bought a tree together, picked out ornaments. we have started our first "family" tradition, right? For the past nine years I've set up the tree pretty much on my own. It is going to be amazing to share this with him.

This time of year is always an emotional time. I'm trying to cope with it. This year will be different. In a way, it may be easier. In the past with so much downtime to be at home, memories flooded me. This time of year is when I have a breakdown of epic porportions. Usually only this time of year does that happen. Throughout the year tears are sporatic, but it seems like during the holidays if the tears get going, they don't cease easily. I love that Brian and I are building a life together.

I'm reading an interesting book: Perfume - The Story of a Murderer by: Patrik Suskind. Very intriguing thus far.

planes, trains and lawnmowers

It seems that I am unable to sleep lately without medication. Really frustrating. My room mate seems to stay up LATE every night. *sigh* Don't quite know what to do about this.

I am going to get a small Christmas Tree this week and put in the room. It's going to be lovely. I wish we could have candles, or at least that my roomie wasn't an RA. There's nothing I love more than Christmas/fall smells.

It's only Tuesday.

Oh Boy.

Praxis test on Saturday. Biggest moment of my college life. EEK.

this is not the north pole

the flipping christmas decorations went up in my dormatory hall last night. WTF? it's not even close to thanksgiving yet!!!! im really livid. you see, i love these holiday decorations when the time is APPROPRIATE. they fill me with warm fuzzies of excitement, BUT when put up too early, they tend to really PISS ME OFF. come on people!! not only that, but there's a local radio station ALREADY playing CONSTANT christmas tunes!!!!! what the crap!! boy has consumerism taken over. it's brainwashing us. i'm severely disappointed.

ugh

Man, I hate when I neglect this thing. There are thoughts pouring through my head everyday that I shoul be blogging about. There's too much going on. It seems like in every phase of my life there is "too much going on". I suppose thats the way I like it though. I don't like to be idle, usually. I volunteered last week at the local animal sheltar. It smelled, but it was really fun. I want to get more involved in the community. Need to get more involved at church, too. I should stop talking about it and just do it!

Sometimes I hate facebook. Idk why I can't seem to maintain friendships from high school like everyone else has seemed to do. I look on facebook sometimes and people are all hanging out with the same people, except me. Granted, I live in another city now, but you know what I mean? I almost feel like a failure. How did it happen? Was it that crappy relationship that destroyed all the ties with my friends, too? Obviously there is no turning back, but sometimes it hurts to see these people. I miss them. I'm sure they never think of me. Same with college friends. I know I left abruptly. That's why I never get invited back for homecoming or other events, I guess. that hurts too. I'm not trying to be a complainer, but it really is depressing sometimes. Feel like I'm missing out.

I am totally stoked about where I'm at. I just wish I would've been able to maintain some of my friendships better.

I need some sun in my life. I'm so sick of this drab weather. Maybe this is why I'm being all moody. I think I'm going to tutor kids at the local Lutheran school for like $30.00/hour.

3 Hours left to do at my practicum
5 weeks of school left
9 weeks til my student teaching application is due

We could play this game all day, I suppose. I promise my next blog will be interesting, insightful, happy, inspiring.

concertgoers

OMG, tonight Shiny Toy Guns came to LU. Boy were they fantastic!! I absolutely adore their electronika sound. The lead singer girl is amazing. I want to be her, actually. Can't pass up a FREE concert, right? The mid-week break from the stress that is my life was fantastic!!! AHH Cynthia, remember when Hellogoodbye came to NW? How fun was THAT?! My newfound friend, Ophelie from France and her bf joined me. It could only have been better if Bri could've made it!

FANTASTIC DAY!!

Taught my first lesson I was being graded on in my practicum! Got 100%. The one that really makes me nervous is Friday. My prof from LU will be there and I still need to come up with the assesment portion of the lesson. How will I have the students show they understand the concept of adverbs? I'm trying to think of something FUN that they can complete within one hour. That includes teaching time and independant practice time. I need to re-work my lesson plans so they are perfect. I give a lesson presentation to my Classroom Management class Monday night, and have an additional plan due for that class as well. I'm up to my ears in lesson plans. AHHH. I am going to take a break from them tonight.

Looking forward to the end of this semester. It's gotten so stressful! No longer an RA which is wonderful!! I get to go stay at Brian's tomorrow night and NOT feel bad! YAY!! I do have to do some cleaning around the dorm to keep my scholarship but hey, that's not too bad at all!

love, hr

its good when today is better than yesterday

yesterday was an awful day. today was better. i got up early, got some stuff done. spent the time between classes working on projects and assignments. i was really productive. the insurance adjuster's called already about yesterday's accident - he'll be out first thing in the morning. spent some time at the library... lunch with a good friend. classes were even decent.

i'm on the verge of stepping down from my RA posistion. as much fun as it has been, the time demands are more than i really want right now. there are some other issues, but we'll just keep it at that! it will ultimately be a good thing for me, i belive. i will switch to a different work&learn that actually is only 10 hours/week and then i won't feel guilty for staying at Brian's. everything happens for a reason, so maybe the reason the RA thing worked out was so i could establish some relationships. pretty great relationships, at that and i am thankful for it.

i really want to bake something this weekend. i also am pining for some quality time with my love.

going to watch the movie "9". so excited for this, even though the review were not so hot.

the Lord is blessing me daily and i am trying to be very aware of that.

love to all
hrf
"Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent." — Eleanor Roosevelt


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OnoJecu9e7c

boobies?

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month, in case you weren't sure. I'm really stoked the NFL is making it a big deal this year. They get paid millions of dollars, they might as well help to spread awareness about something worthy. They are wearing pink shoes, gloves and other such items... pretty cool.

Fuze, the amazing healthy infuzion drink, has a breast cancer pink version out. I had to buy some, of course. 10/$1, that's a good deal and it's delicious and it's good for you. So, you should partake.

And, for real, check yourself. Breast cancer has affected too many close to me. Do what you can to support, k?

Sorry I've been alusive as of late. I've got so much going on. SO MUCH.

-h